Curious Allure (excerpt siege war)

I have been busy rewriting my third book. I started to learn about the Scene / Sequel format and thought it would be a good idea to show how I’ve been using it to help my story. An analysis of any kind actually will help with a saggy middle and end that won’t follow. I blogged a few scenes as I normally would and will see how it works into the Scene / Sequel format.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

As both men walked down the road toward Demont they could hear the sounds of the assault that had just begun on the castle. They both started to run, the adrenaline was pumping, the fear that the enemy would escape the assault was quelled.

As they could see the orange glow over the horizon a heavy mist overcame them and the visibility was poor. They could hear the artillery and the sound of brick and mortar toppling to the earth. Of course there would be return fire as well, but how well could they have prepared this was a surprise assault.

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

The two men hardly spoke, Repo was trying to figure out how to get his equipment back from the helmet he had worn previous to its actual owner taking command of himself.

As the two men approached the front line they were met by Bleda who seemed quite upset at his unexplained absence. Atilla hardly flinched at the suggestion and went right on screaming orders and demanded some more appropriate clothing for his friend.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

Bleda was still cautious that some miscalculation or suspicion of his actual identity could mean instant death. This was the real Atilla and the actual Repo before him.

Stev wasn’t 100% sure but he believed his brother sent him to man the siege tower that seemed to be idle, that would get him out of the way for him to resume command after Bleda had been doing very well without him. He would do his best to soften the blows coming from his end.

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

Repo wanted the same results as Atilla, but for different reasons. Atilla’s interests were actually Southern Gaul and Italy, he was beginning to wonder why his forces were wasting their time in this forsaken country. He would wait and see.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

He was where he needed to be but Repo was still at a disadvantage not knowing the language, he could only stand by and watch as the cannons battered the castle walls.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

With not much else to do Indico decided to interrogate the prisoner that looked remarkably like the Hun ruler. She knew the demeanor of the man had changed and no longer suspected that it was Repo looking out of those deep brown eyes at her. Flex had been doing some calculating on his own. How Repo was able to transfer from one person to another in the same cycle.

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

Indico brought the prisoner some food and water. He said his name was Ruga and someone had contacted him to be at the castle and wait for instructions.

Indico let Flex do all the talking, she understood nothing of what was said.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

You weren’t here when we visited you last. Where were you? Ruga seemed confused, I was outside, but I don’t know how. I was in battle gear, mounted on a horse. Then suddenly I was back here.

“Do you have any family here?”

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

“My parents the Lord and Lady Marpain. They aren’t my real parents, I was adopted when I was four. I was bartered when my real parents couldn’t pay their taxes, quite a story — my life.

Flex could tell the sincerity in which this man spoke, his suspicions however, didn’t have to be passed on to this man of humble beginnings. He should be freed though, he shouldn’t die here in this prison.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

The hits to the outer wall shook the entire castle. Flex got Indico to go up to the battlements to let him take a look.

One end of the siege wall was out shooting the other end three to one, that must be where Stev is he considered. He could see the two figures giving orders at the forefront. He recognized Repo right away.

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

Okay, Indico I’ve seen enough.

We have to create a diversion, something to draw the Huns away, there is no reason for them to be here.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

Retiring to her chamber amidst the constant barrage she saw a lone figure in the corner of her room. At first she was startled, then she realized it was Rawley. She ran over to him and hugged him, I feared you were dead, I was sent on a mission and wasn’t able to scale your walls. How did you ever get in here. I had a little help from my friend Merlin, he says hello.

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

We were just asking for a miracle. We need someone to draw the Huns away. They don’t want to be here as much as we don’t want them here. Is there something Merlin can do?

“If there is anything to be done, he can do it.” Rawley assured.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

“We need to have a message sent to Atilla, that the Romans are in Metz or Rome is sending troops, something to draw them off. Repo wants them here, not the Huns.”

Rawley kissed Indico, and Flex took it like a man, with no Petra on the other side, it wasn’t quite the same. She watched him repel down the side of the Castle and disappear into the night.

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

After Merlin was able to send a message, Atilla gave Repo one day to get what he wanted because they were leaving, they believed the Romans were fleeing Metz heading to Rome. That appealed very much to him. They had already started to dismantle some the the equipment to get it rolling.

SCENE goal conflict disaster

Repo only had hours to get the instrument and the mysterious metal it held inside. Then he remembered the lost twin. He wondered what kind of effect that would have on the Hun rulers if they knew the Celts were holding their brother prisoner, inside their castle. The only problem was how to communicate that to them.

With Stev and Atilla before him Repo tried to express his concern for the brother they knew nothing about. Atilla stood emotionless as did Bleda, but behind the stoic face an element of understanding went undetected. Stev could pass that information on but he know Repo was trying his best to use Atilla for his own purposes.

SEQUEL reaction dilemma decision

Bleda wanted to know if Repo knew their brother was inside, why didn’t he warn them before the weapons were turned on them?

He wasn’t going to help him, he was going to watch him squirm.

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